"Store cool"

I assume this is some kind of spy code? Thanks Emma.

"Escape Rope"

This rope is clearly decorative. Thanks Joel.

"New" Cheeses

I mean, I guess they are still, like, fermented? Maybe not, maybe it's just a pool of milk. Thanks Jake.

"The Attorney"

So wait, is "the attorney" his fight name, or is he actually an attorney? Thanks Andy.

"sugar"

I found the nutra-sweet, guys. Thanks Melissa.

"non-alcoholic"

I don't know if you should encourage people to trick their friends like this. Thanks Ben.

"Authentic"

Maybe these folks are pointing out that our notion of authenticity itself is culturally constructed? Thanks Rick.

"book holiday party now"

This sounds like my kind of holiday, but maybe the quotation marks mean the opposite of that? Thanks Kathleen.

free-esque

I guess there's no such thing as a free pisco tasting. Thanks Justin.

"do not" "use" "elevator"

This is all part of a complicated code, clearly. Thanks Matt.

"No" dogs

Does this mean, like, metaphorical dogs? Like somebody's ex-boyfriend? Thanks wavking.

"Quiet" Please

I assume this means they want you miming blasting a trumpet right outside, right? Thanks Jennifer.

"Hot dogs"

Actually.... it's cool cats.
Thanks Kimberly.