"momentarily"

Submitter Baptite translates to: "Momentarily" out of order.
So I guess it's going to be a while.

fake polite barber

This barber is not sorry and the shop will close at some time someday. Thanks Matthew.

We make Granite "Affordable"

I guess "affordable" is a moving target. Thanks Genevieve and Eric.

I know it when I "see" it?

Submitter Stephanie sends along this story as well:
I spotted this guy standing on the side of the road in Centralia, WA. When I approached him and asked if I could take a picture he said yes, then told me I needed to submit my clothes to Jesus because I was "dressed like a whore."

(Miss the reference in the post title? I got this wikipedia article for you, and it will blow your mind.)

"Enter" "here"

Yeah, this is totally the place you "enter" the "contest." Your entries definitely will not be thrown away. Thanks Jane.

(Sorry for the lack of posts, I got distracted by finals week. It's over now, so my new excuse is summer break. Thanks for our patience and your many awesome submissions that I will continue to sort through!)

"All Legal"

This may be the least reassuring thing I have ever seen, and that is REALLY saying something. Thanks Stephanie.

Delivery Entrance "Only"

I guess this entrance is for delivery PLUS. Thanks Don.

"Salt the Fries"

I guess this is some kind of inside joke or reference. Fries humor: it's very complex. Thanks KittyLugnut.

No playing with "balls"

It gets better, Kristin saw this at a middle school basketball tournament. MIDDLE SCHOOL. BALLS. Ok, you get it.

"Fresh" squeezed

The squeezing of this orange juice is a poor excuse for fresh. Thanks Rachel.

"Mining"

Maybe Alaska's real future is in Miming Mining! Thanks Erin.

Salad "or" Veges

And? For? Over? Is? Thanks James.

"hat" rack

This rack is actually for anything but hats, and SOMEBODY is breaking the rules. Thanks Kacee.

Equipment room

There is so much going on in this one. Two fonts of quotation marks, one pair without a mate, odd decorations... I don't even know what to say, and obviously have no idea what is actually in the room, if it is even a room. Thanks Keisha.

May or may not take credit cards

The credit card quotation is pretty good, but I have to say my favorite thing about this sign is the exclamation mark after cigarettes! making me think it may be a musical. Thanks Allie.

No "Loud" Music

Devin spotted this one on the door of his apartment gym. I do not know whose definition of "loud" is at work here, but it is definitely contested.

So, like, the tv show?

I guess this is the decoy E.R.. Real one is somewhere else. Thanks D.

Apparently it's an "art"

(Click to embiggen) I'm not in the business of distinguishing art from "art" but this is making me wonder what avant garde pet grooming would be. Thanks Adam.