Preferred by amateurs

Submitters Jan and Jen explain that this was on the box for a wall-mounted laundry tub. I guess semi-pro laundresses think it's the jam.

How big is it?

I guess this clothing barn is offering moderate discounts. Thanks Nathan.

or, maybe do?

I guess some kind of marking or damaging of this port-a-potty might be encouraged, but keep it on the DL. Thanks Erin!

"Save $100"

Ok, don't save it actually, spend $200 on this thing, you caught us. Thanks Jack.

or do we?

I mean, maybe SOME deliveries would be welcome at 6:45. But probably not yours. Thanks Clint.

shut the lights "off"

I guess if you put them on dim, it's good enough? Thanks Jan and Jen.

Depending on your definition

As a former employee of a Subway franchise, I'm going to guess "We Bake Our Own Bread" is a hit song about the miserable day the AC went out. Or an implication that if one thaws, scores and bakes bread that comes frozen and shaped, one has only "baked" it. Thanks Kelly.

"parking"

I like that with the combo of music house and package store, the parking is the questionable part. Maybe in St Louis it makes sense? Thanks Andee.

"Acoustic" entertainment

I wonder if it's really visual? Maybe they think the use of microphones makes it not technically acoustic? Thanks Scott.

"love" thy neighbor

I guess God would be okay with pretending to love your neighbor? Thanks Kata.

"Lunchtime" you say?

Today's theme is ironic lunches. Here's one also. I guess it's served around 4 pm? 9 am? Thanks Rita.

"Lunch special"

We mean all of this ironically. ALL of it. It's very ironic. Thanks IA.

"Best" parking rates

Stacy and Justin saw this sign on their vacation. No word from them about the outrageous parking rates.

"World Famous"

Submitter Jack quips: Brooklyn is not the world. Don't tell them!

"we care enough"

I guess they barely care enough? Thanks Conor.

As the kids say

You know, it's at a place, since we're so hip, we're calling it "inside." Because it's for "insiders." Thanks Mark.

Your company for fake security

We don't care how secure anything actually is, just how secure it LOOKS. Thanks Lisa and Cory.

"please"

Submitter Kristen saw this on a ferry, and feels woefully patronized.

in a manner of speaking

Submitter Robert explains that this is from a hospital, so perhaps the definition of "courteous" is more stringent and "very good meal" less so?

Select your "fish"

I wonder what you really get? Fish-shaped chicken? Thanks James.

"Our Goal"

The title of this poem is "our goal" I guess. Not the best poem I've read. Thanks Eric.

Computer paper "only"

I guess if some fax paper makes it in, that's still a-ok. Thanks Luke.

Sign "your" application

You know, or somebody else's application, no problem. Thanks Julie.

Sorry for "inconvenience"

I wonder what kind of "emergency" they are talking about here. A really "inconvenient" one... Thanks Shankman.

"ultra torture"

I don't feel right making fun of this sign which seems to have been made by a young boy, but I so enjoyed looking at it I felt I should let you all enjoy it too. Thanks Margaret!

Co"a"st

I don't know how the name of this lard is really spelled, but I'm guessing it doesn't include an A? Thanks JM.

very sarcastic about shopping baskets

The people at this store are so exasperated by your bag use, that they lost all ability to be serious. Thanks Darlene.

broken-ish

I am just pretending this is broken so you don't use it. It's my private door. Thanks Thomas.

"While Supplies Last"

Obviously, "supplies" do not include my personal case in the back that I'm saving to sell at a profit later, duh. Thanks Gabe.

ok... gaping abyss

I guess this door doesn't lead to any stairs. Maybe a ladder? Thanks Sarah.

serving "wine"

So I guess the wine they are serving isn't very good. Thanks Dan.

"Polite Notice"

I see a lot of fake polite things on this blog, I like that this one is more upfront about it. Thanks Kate.

Candidate from "Texas"

I wonder where this congressional candidate is really hoping to represent. Donorvania? Thanks Alex.

Or... one at a time?

Here is a picture of two of my favorite people in front of a slogan Nick's is only willing to quote rather than assert. Thanks Jamie and Becky!

Greenish button?

I do not doubt that this button has seen greener days, but it still looks green to me. Maybe the person who wrote the sign is red/green colorblind but won't admit it. Thanks Kurt.

Among the freshest?

Submitter Dana writes, "This grocery store in Pinconning, Michigan seems to debate whether spices (and herbs, despite their lack of mention) that are dried really can be the 'freshest.'"

"Lunch" special

I guess we can eat any meal you want, as long as it's 3 courses and around noon. Thanks Jeffrey.

Ask for "assistance"

I guess if you ask, what you get won't be as helpful as you might hope. Thanks Jeffrey.

"No" donations

Ok, let's face it: the spelling of bussines in this sign is really the best part, or maybe the cross-eyed smiley face. But it has quotation marks too, so I'm posting it for everyone to enjoy. Thanks Nina.

it's a trap!

Submitter Laura explains (kind of): Was studying late at the university last night, and went down to see if there was any food in the physics students' lounge for me to eat.  And there was!  But it was 'free'.